I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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