Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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