but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Randomize