is your mom at the bar?
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
wakey wakey hands off snakey
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize