So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
