is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
It's just like the Real World with babies
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
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