Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize