I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
