so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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