Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
