I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize
