what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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