Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
