Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
