i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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