i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
You ruined the universe
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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