I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Randomize
