she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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