Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
