He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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