my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I didn't notice because vodka
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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