What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
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Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
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Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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