I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Randomize