He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
