Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
