You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
