you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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