His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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