she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I want to be your penis for a week.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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