a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize