Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize