So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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