just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
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