good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Randomize