does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
