shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
dude. I can hear the air.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
