I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize