Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize