Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
