It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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