Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Randomize
