you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize