No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
