remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
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