Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
