spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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