Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize