At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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