I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
