And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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