There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.