just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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